[31] Loneliness is a Bitch
I really love and loathe not having a boyfriend. There are pluses and minuses. Advantages and disadvantages. But after almost a year, you begin to get kind of melancholy about the whole thing. Sometimes I'll just sit in my bed and cry. And you know why I cry? Because I'm sitting in my bed. All alone. And I don't like that feeling. That feeling that you get when there's absolute silence and you realize that there's no one there to talk to, or look at, or any shoulders to put your head on. And for those of you who don't quite know the feeling, it's very difficult to bear.
Story of my life.
Garrott actually asked me out yesterday, which was... weird. I never expected him to ask me out when we barely ever see each other in the first place. I said I'd think about it, but the truth is, it would never work out. That's what happened with Clay. That's what happened with all of them.
I'm too much of a homebody. I never go out. Most of it is because I don't have a driver's license and my parents are assholes and usually refuse to take me anywhere after 8. I fucking hate them for that. My social life is somewhere in the negatives as of now. I need a fucking car. Fuck.
And I need to stop wearing the same outfits every week. That's kind of starting to bug me.
before // after